After seeing the response by the British press to his failure to secure a gold medal in the Olympic road race on Saturday, cycling sensation Mark Cavendish has decided to accept an offer from X-Factor executive producer Simon Cowell.
“Following a difficult year with Team Sky that culminated in frustration at the Tour de France and utter disappointment in London, I have decided to take a break from the sport of cycling to reflect on the future of my life and my professional career,” declared Mark Cavendish at a makeshift conference Sunday night at the British House in the Olympic Village.
With his partner Peta Todd at his side and flanked by a smirking Cowell, Cavendish outlined the offer from the music mogul and X-Factor executive producer.
“Simon has graciously extended an offer to impact the future of music in England. As everyone knows, I’m a huge music lover and I know good vocals when I hear them. Simon also said that I need to think of my career after cycling. Besides my wonderful family, there’s more to life than just winning sprints and setting records on the bike,” commented Cavendish.
Cowell was quick to point out the Manxman’s caché. “Mark is a brilliant young man whose talents were completely and utterly wasted this year at Team Sky. He’s been on my radar since his days with my good friend Bob Stapleton, and I felt now was the best time to pull the trigger on an offer before that guy with the airline got his talons into Team Sky,” chuckled Cowell. “I have almost never been wrong in spotting talent. I think this young lad has a bright future in the industry, and I’m more than willing to take him under my wing.”
When asked what Cavendish’s role would be on the next season of X-Factor, both Cavendish and Cowell were tight-lipped.
“All we’ll say is that I’m looking forward to Mark’s role on the next X-Factor. The viewers on ITV will be in store for a treat, and the British music scene will never been the same,” commented Cowell, adding that the contract was for two years with the option of renewal for both parties.
Cavendish refused to comment on the challenges at Team Sky that culminated with Team Sky principal David Brailsford baiting Cavendish to find a job elsewhere on a team in 2013 after the superstar expressed his disappointments and frustration with his racing schedule and support. Brailsford has been criticized in the British media for “abandoning” Cavendish in favor of a team utterly and completed centered on Tour de France champion Brad Wiggins.
“Look, I like Brad, and I like the team. My problems with Team Sky have nothing to do with my mates. I’ve already accomplished what I set out to achieve in cycling, and it’s time to take a break to see what I can attain off the bike,” concluded Cavendish.
Brailsford was “gobsmacked” by the announcement and rather upset that Cavendish would conduct the press conference “in his house on his turf,” according to anonymous British Team Sky freelance media sources. The Dr. Evil doppelgänger was seen at the Olympic Velodrome moments after the announcement, chain-smoking and yelling loudly at his right and left arms, Shane Sutton and Rod Ellsworth. After several failed attempts, Brailsford finally managed to tip over two stands of GB cycling equipment in anger and then stormed off, refusing to comment.
Episode 9 of X-Factor begins next month, with the most anticipated season launch to date. Stay tuned to the X-Factor website and cyclismas.com for future details on the Cavendish X-Factor experience.