Reports out of London have UCI president Pat McQuaid fuming over the inability of the London Organizing Committee for the Olympic Games to satisfy his whims with only days to go before the start.
London Mayor Boris Johnson and LOCOG chair Seb Coe give reluctant “thumbs” up to Pat McQuaid’s requests for the games (Source: nymag.com)
McQuaid wrote to Sir Seb Coe himself to ensure that the “…president of the greatest sport in the world and most global sport on the planet receive the proper red carpet treatment afforded by his hallowed position” stated the letter, recently obtained by Cyclismas.
McQuaid had requested a gold and velvet chair to be prominently located at the velodrome for the track portion of the cycling events, argued for the vehicle ID #1 for his new Bentley convertible, specified a gluten-free food service punctuated by La Bonnotte potatoes and Wagyu steaks, and demanded an entourage of British MI5 agents to protect him from the athletes and the fans during the games.
The LOCOG admitted privately that they’ve had to re-sticker every car for the road race in order to comply with McQuaid’s request after receiving threatening phone calls from both Igor Makarov and Hein Verbruggen. The committee has also rushed to comply with his other requests in order for Yorkshire to remain in the running for the 2016 Tour de France start.
UCI spokesperson Enrico Carpani confirmed there were some challenges to the LOCOG fulfilling their requests, but wouldn’t provide any details.
“Our organisation did send requests into LOCOG revolving around Mr. McQuaid’s requirements for the games, including the car ID #1 for the road race, which may have caused them some difficulty this week, but I cannot confirm or deny any of the other information you stated,” commented Carpani via phone.
Carpani did provide details of one initiative the UCI is happy to support for the London Games.
“The UCI is very happy to support the Olympic Games safe-sex initiative by distribution of condoms and other prophylactics to ensure all athletes are sexually protected during the games, including our male cyclists who have garnered quite a reputation at past games. We have contributed significant financial input to this initiative,” concluded Carpani.
Cycling commentator and sometimes Eurosport pundit Anthony Gibb weighed in with his thoughts on the developments.
“McQuaid truly thinks he is the King of Cycling, so none of these requests surprise me. You should hear what he had ordered for Qatar – it involved a harem. However, I will say that I shall be down at the athletes’ village offering my support to the London Games safe-sex initiative,” stated Gibb.
Despite the fact the UCI refused to confirm the details of their massive requests of the LOCOG, there were truckloads of La Bonnette potatoes being wheeled into the food service area of the Olympic village, along with several Japanese-speaking chefs discussing “that Overlord of cycling and his beef needs.” There was also a mad rush to resticker cars with ID numbers Wednesday ahead of the Olympic Road Race, which takes place on Saturday.
The opening ceremonies of the London Games of Corporate Debauchery begin Friday night with the ritualistic lighting of the flaming cauldron. There was no confirmation at this time of virgin offerings or goat sacrifices as part of these ceremonies, however.
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