Shortly after the UCI Management Committee Meeting in Valkenburg yesterday, Cyclismas scribe Frank Mercer had the opportunity to sit down and chat with the honorary president of the UCI, Hein Verbruggen, to get to the bottom of the Kimmage action, the Hamilton book, Armstrong, and Landis. The interview occurred moments after this interview conducted by Daniel Benson of Cyclingnews.com
Cyclismas has chosen to publish the entire unedited transcript of their conversation.
Verbruggen almost blows a vein after his interactions with journalists Thursday in Valkenburg
Frank Mercer: Evening, Hein. You look a little rattled. What happened there a few minutes ago?
Hein Verbruggen: Ridiculous! The bloody press has turned against us. I can’t believe the top cycling publication in the WORLD would have the audacity to ask me such insolent questions. For fuck’s sake, I’m 72! I don’t deserve this shit treatment.
FM: Alright can we…
HV: PAT! You horse’s arse! Quit laughing about it. You’re making a spectacle! Pour some more bloody wine for Igor and Andrei before they defect to the other side. The Lord in Heaven, I’m surrounded by incompetence.
FM: Ahem…
HV: Yes, yes, yes. Ask your questions. I’m almost finished with this bottle of Bordeaux. When it’s done, so are you.
FM: Why are you suing Paul Kimmage?
HV: I don’t like him. He doesn’t follow the game plan. Almost all of the other journalists have fallen into the ranks. EXCEPT FOR THE FORMER NUMBER ONE WEBSITE IN THE CYCLING WORLD. IF IT’S THE LAST THING I DO I’M GOING TO RUIN THAT DAMNED ORGANIZATION. YOU HEAR ME BENSON?!?!
FM: Um, Hein? Can we get back to the question?
HV: Yes, yes, yes. The question? Right. I don’t know where Landis is at the moment.
FM: That wasn’t the question.
HV: Yes it was.
FM: Uh, no it wasn’t.
HV: Are you calling me a liar? ARE YOU?
FM: No, I’m not. I’m merely…
HV: I’M NOT A LIAR! IT’S MY SPORT! IT’S MY WORLD, AND HAS BEEN FOR OVER 20 YEARS. I’M 72 AND I DON’T DESERVE THIS KIND OF TREATMENT, ESPECIALLY IN MY OWN THRONE ROOM. YOU HEAR THAT BENSON?!!?
FM: You do realise Benson left and went back to his hotel room?
HV: [Leaning in closely and speaking quietly] He can still hear me. I know he can. They all can. I whisper to them.
FM: Who?
HV: The doubters. The naysayers. The ones who fail to follow my rules and my instructions. Just ask Dick Pound. We won the lawsuit there. He had to retract those statements.
FM: You’ve never provided a transcript to the public, nor commented about it publicly.
HV: And?
FM: There’s no proof of it then.
HV: My word should be more than enough proof. I am Heinricus Verbruggen. I am 72. I am the king of cycling. This is my domain. When the kings of history spoke, their word was as if it were God’s words.
FM: So you’re saying… nevermind. Let’s get back to the question I asked a few minutes ago.
HV: Lance is clean. He never, never, never tested positive.
FM: According to USADA, this may not be true.
HV: Look we can go back into history and try to change a great many things. We could even try to say someone else deserves to hold the hour record. But we should just say that at the time, Lance was clean as he didn’t test positive at the time of the test. That should be the only benchmark. You don’t see other people going back into history and changing facts to suit their purposes do you? No! Because people just don’t do those sorts of things.
FM: That didn’t make any sense.
HV: Are you challenging me?
FM: Let’s talk about Hamilton. Are you planning to explore legal action against him for his book?
HV: No. There’s no reason to. No one of importance will take the book seriously, nor will it amount to much of anything. It’s a great fairy tale, Tyler will make his money from a best seller, and the world will return to as it was. As it did in 1999, 2002, 2004, 2006, 2009, and 2015.
FM: 2015?
HV: Sorry, nevermind. We’re not there yet. I’ll keep future gems in my briefcase for later.
FM: Shall we discuss USADA and Armstrong? Will you ratify the ban?
HV: Next question.
FM: Let’s discuss Global Cycling Promotions.
HV: Let’s not.
FM: I’d like to know if the substantial amount of ProTour funds that were used to set up the entity have been repaid.
HV: None of your business. Next question.
FM: Kimmage.
HV: Yes?
FM: Why sue him?
HV: Didn’t I already answer the question?
FM: No.
HV: Yes I did.
FM: No you did not.
HV: Bah, bullshit. Goddamned journalists are stupid these days. Running around with accusations and publishing half truths and no truths.
FM: Um…
HV: YOU’RE NO DIFFERENT THAN ANY OTHER JOURNALIST GODDAMMIT! YOU’RE ALL THE [face goes red wanting to say the f-word again] FFFFFFFF … ARGH! What is wrong with society? It’s this socialized media bullshit and this Facenovel Internets things that are wrecking our game. How can people be raising money for Kimmage using nothing but websites? Why do they care? Kimmage needs to be punished for talking, and that Jonathan Vaughters is next. I take Jonathan out for dinner every single January and this is how he repays me? By cooperating with Tygart? That lawyer? That’s it, the interview is over.
FM: You didn’t answer my questions.
HV: You failed to do the necessary homework for me to answer your questions. Go back to journalism school and learn a thing or two. Or five. Maybe ten. Igor! Let’s talk about Kazahkstan again! Igor! We have business to create! Come with me to China. Pat, fetch my jacket.
No Comments