Floyd toasts his suspended sentence.

The trial centered around a gentlemen named Alain Quiros (who coincidentally has been approached by the producers of the James Bond franchise for the use of his circumstances in a future unnamed film), accused of performing the actual hacking. Quiros insisted that Landis “most certainly” agreed and activated his activities involved in the trojan horse program used to gain access to a French anti-doping lab. This assertion was refuted by Landis’ partner in crime, Arnie Baker, who said that he thought he was “downloading really good cyber porn.”

When reached for comment on the case, Landis was upbeat and positive about the verdict.

“Look, I was convicted by people in a country that I really could care less about. I really have no desire to visit France in the next twelve months as I’ve been hunting mainly American cougars and had stopped my European escapades with the Monaco set back in 2008,” commented Landis. “This just means that I’ll have to spend time on the Spanish side of the Pyrenees until November of next year. Maybe I’ll just crash at Jonathan’s [Garmin owner Jonathan Vaughters] place in Girona instead of Tommy V’s.”

Landis “feels vindication” in the result of the court case, as in his eyes, it shows that he’s not guilty.

“Just because some dumb cluck sends me stuff, and I got it mixed up with my case doesn’t mean I’m guilty of anything other than keeping bad records,” concluded Landis.

Landis has no intention of appealing the verdict as, “no one really gives a rat’s ass what the French retards think anyways.”

French authorites declined to comment for this report.