Come into the last 40k of a race today – or woe betide the last 10k of a “sportive” – and it’s not so much a few fluttering butterflies as a flock of colourful hummingbirds seemingly struck down by some kind of poisonous gas. All over the sides of the road lie discarded wrappers, half-eaten gels, and tossed bidons. Throwing your bottle to a spectator is one thing, it’s a way to reach out and touch someone; I still recall watching my first tour of Britain, and I still have the bottles. However, throwing non-biodegradable foil wrappers into the hedgerows of a town which has been kind enough to close it’s roads to allow you and 9000 other dentists to ride (not race) your bikes 100 miles in 7-1/2 hours is not pro, it’s not classy, and it’s not acceptable.

I’ve heard all the counter arguments: “It makes everything else in my pockets sticky.” “I can’t reach around to put gels away, so I tuck them in my shorts [or even worse tape them to the top tube] then throw away the wrapper.” “I was going to come back for it.” Rubbish. If you lack the co-ordination to a) consume a gel in its entirety so that it doesn’t leave goop all over your pocket or b) access all your pockets, then you need to seriously reconsider your position on the bike, or indeed your choice of hobby. And no, you were not coming back for it, because if you had the energy to ride 10k back and pick up your gel then you most likely had the energy to pocket it in the first place.

Now if you really must keep wrappers separate, there are some pretty cool jerseys out there (including the maillot jaune) which let you do that. Frankly, I’ve always had a pretty high level of success popping used wrappers in between my jersey and shorts at the back. If I get sticky, its not the end of the world, I like to shower after races anyway. I hope you do as well.

You can reuse your wrappers as well. I’ve saved many a ride with a foil boot for my tyre but you could also make a cool bag. I’d love to see more gel companies working on reusable flasks (credit to Hammer, they make one) or biodegradable packaging (credit to bananas – the original and the best biodegradable high potassium sucrose/fructose mix energy product) but this will only happen if consumers start showing the slightest modicum of concern.

With races increasingly struggling to get authorization from local councils and promoters finding higher and higher levels of opposition from localities, this kind of thing IS becoming an issue for our sport. I saw a racer get a time penalty for dropping a wrapper last year. He complained and the whole peloton turned on him. This is the kind of collective condemnation of anti-social behavior which society relies upon, so next time you start seeing the butterflies, let fly yourself.

Sometimes I get so hungry I could eat a horse

Especially riding in Southern Europe there’s a pretty big focus on weight loss. All kinds of stupid dietary rules get enforced; you can eat bread but not the inside of the bread. So beautiful, handbaked loaves end up getting mauled of their doughy centers. You can eat cheese but not melted cheese, as that has three times as many calories (I’m pretty sure I can trace this one to the fact that you can see the oil on melted cheese, but if you really want to, you can blot it off making it less fatty). Wine is okay, but beer is banned. Butter wasn’t okay even though it made up a good chunk of the stews and croissants we’d eat, and you could go nuts with olive oil.  Sometimes we’d be deprived of meat if we weren’t climbing well, and dairy was cut out as it made you “phlegmy.” Now I don’t know about you, but If I’m creeping and then you stop me eating that’s when you’re going to see me really crawling!

I’ve seen riders do some nuts stuff to slim down – long rides on coffee and water. Low carb diets (I once saw a dude eat a hard boiled egg on a ride). Not eating for three hours after a ride to encourage “fat burning.” Compulsively eating only “healthy” food and when that isn’t available refusing to eat at all, even at the expense of their performance. Other riders seem to convince themselves that you can get everything you need from powder and pills. I’ve always put my diabetes ahead of my weight loss and tried to be sensible, but there are plenty of cyclists who are not backwards in coming forwards with their “expert” advice on what I should be eating, telling me how I cause my own diabetes by eating sugar/bread/red meat/ or drinking beer. I often wonder if they have considered taking these revelations to the medical community, but few of them seem to have published their findings. Odd that.

Then you get the race diets: On race day, no milk in your cereal, orange juice or soymilk don’t make you phlegmy (OJ on cereal, in the morning when cortisol is high will give you world record bloodsugars, though!),  but I can’t help noticing the cappuccinos which go down before the race! Three hours seems to be the golden rule; three hours before the race you MUST eat, normally you must eat pasta. If you aren’t in Italy, this pasta must be boiled to within an inch of becoming a primordial slime. Sometimes this is accompanied by chicken but often it is served “white” maybe with salt or if you’re lucky olive oil, and if you’re not so lucky, with brown sugar. If it’s hot, meat is off the cards, as it doesn’t digest well (to be fair there is perhaps some use in this) but you still have to eat your pasta even if you’re in the back seat of a Renault and it’s 40 degrees centigrade and you know it’s going to make you feel sick. This meal could come at any time of day, even if you’ve only had breakfast two hours before. It isn’t an option – diabetic or not, you had to eat this meal, it was like taking mass. In the race you get sandwiches, long races might start with ham and continue on to jam. The last few kilometers generally saw the arrival of flat Coke and maybe some gels or Guarana drinks.

After the race you’ll get a Coke or an Aquarius, but no proper food until you get back home. Occasionally the race organizer lays on a buffet, in which case the competitive attitude continues and undereating becomes the new race. Sometimes you win food but if it’s cakes, sweets, salami, biscuits or one of the other delicious delicacies which townsfolk tend to donate, it often doesn’t get back home with you lest you go berserk with a kilogram of pork and end up climbing like a sumo wrestler.

I remember starting to ride over lunchtime, as this seemed a pretty good way to cut out some calories and it was; it was also a good way to miss out on an important time to catch up with family and friends. I know when a lot of my teammates have gone on pretty severe diets, they’ve become angry, cagy and aggressive.  They get into ludicrous situations like refusing to let people see them eat and then binging on their own. Often riders refuse to eat foods that they are not familiar with. It seems a great shame that we get to travel so much and I would hate not to take a chance to sample the food of the wonderful countries I visit. True you could get sick but, when people kindly want to share their cuisine with you, chances are you won’t.

Don’t get me wrong, there are times when I need to cut a few but I try to do it sensibly and with regard to my diabetes. I ride a little bit before breakfast and try not to snack too much after dinner. I eat a few more vegetables and a bit less rice and pasta. I switch up my protein sources and methods of cooking them to include a bit less fat. I always ride with a lot of dextrose in case it all goes wrong, and sometimes it does. I make sure to test more and use my pod to make tiny basal changes on the fly. I give myself  time and enough treats that I don’t feel like I’m missing out on my friends and family and isolating myself. Even if I get lighter this way I won’t race better. It’ll make me sad and upset and in this mindset I don’t race my best.  Food is too good not to enjoy and we have to be sensible, but if you eat real food in decent amounts it’s not too much of a problem.

an editorial follow-up by Bikezilla to his 4-part interview with James Stout

You might think that speaking to James Stout for our interview formed my opinion of Phil Southerland and Team Type 1 management. You’d be incorrect

When I first heard about James, my immediate opinion was, “Disgruntled former employee,” “prima donna,” “crybaby.”

To quote myself:

James is at once, mature and immature; humble and arrogant; naive and wise; grounded and flaky; stoic and a drama queen; tough and a sniveling bitch.”

What James is not, however, is a bitter former employee out to badmouth his ex-boss.

I gave James opportunity after opportunity to talk shit about Phil Southerland and Team Type 1. Not once did he take advantage of that, not even off the record.

When he discussed Phil and the team he seemed frustrated, sad, flabbergasted, regretful, but not angry.

Contrary to what I had expected, James felt and continues to feel a significant debt of gratitude toward Phil and TT1.

In fact, the one and only time that James ever seemed angry, was when he discussed the doctor who mockingly told him to “play chess.”

Almost as soon as I began my research on James Stout, I came across the account of Willem Van den Eynde, whose abuse at the hands of Southerland and Team Type 1 instantly one-upped the Stout story.

To summarize the situation, according to Van den Eynde himself, Willem was denied food and sleep, forced to sleep on the floor of Southerland’s hotel room, screamed at by Southerland for daring to momentarily place his bag on the bed in that room, berated by management for daring to train on his bike, given a diet that neither conformed to his diabetic needs nor to his needs as an athlete (putting him at risk of a hypo), was denied testing supplies by Phil Southerland though they were readily at hand (apparently Southerland laughed at him after the denial of testing supplies), was forced to pay all of his own expenses and never reimbursed.

Then I learned that WHILE James was going through his ordeal there were three other riders (at a minimum) who acknowledged they were going through similar hassles and harassments.

Every one of those other three riders is so intimidated and outright terrified of what Phil Southerland might do to them that they all refuse to discuss their time with Team Type 1.

The topper, however, the detail that pushed things over the edge in my formation of an opinion regarding Phil Southerland and Team Type 1, was hearing the rumors of an insurance fraud investigation that is ongoing in Italy.

The spread of dishonesty and corruption had become too much to overlook, or even to doubt, at least in my own mind.

From those few details that I’ve just shared came another handful of thoughts and opinions:

• If we know that just during Stout’s time with TT1 there were at least four riders all in similar circumstances, and we know that prior to that time there was at least one other, how can we not assume that there are many, many more such cases?
• Looking at the bulk of just the known cases; three of the five are so frightened of Southerland that they’ve gone into hiding and cannot bring themselves to speak of their time on TT1. Willem Van den Eynde spoke up very briefly, but has since vanished and gone silent.
• It seems that Southerland and top management at Team Type 1 are a kind of wolf pack, identifying the weak sheep, culling them from the herd and savaging them without mercy. The difference here, in my opinion, is that unlike wolves, Southerland and his crew seem to inflict their torments purely for sport.
• Worse, Southerland and his top managers choose young athletes who lack the life experience to even properly recognize what’s being done to them until it is far too late.

The only thing that set James apart from the other victims (those we know of and those we don’t), is that after a series of personal struggles, which saw him very nearly caving in to the same fear and intimidation that has muzzled all the others, he found just enough spine to step up and tell his story.

The interview that I did with James very nearly didn’t happen. Even after it was completed and written, James wanted it pulled and he see-sawed between hiding it from the world and daring to allow it to see the light of day.

Why? One can only presume that it is out of fear of Phil Southerland.

The day after Part 1 of our interview went up on Cyclismas for the first time (it was taken down for several days due to James’ concerns, then republished), Phil Southerland called James and screamed at him on the phone for 45 minutes.

If you’ve read Part 1, then you know that part of the interview is completely innocuous. There’s not one thing in there that could possibly be taken as negative regarding Phil Southerland or Team Type 1. They’re barely even mentioned.

Considering that Part 1 was completely inoffensive, then Phil could only have been in a panic about what he thought would be coming in future installments of the interview. Since nothing negative was even hinted at in Part 1, Phil must have knowledge of things that he 100% knows that he does not want released to the general public.

Phil Southerland had avoided any personal contact with James for months while James was struggling to learn what was going on and why, while James was losing his apartment, living in his car, unsure of where he would find his next meal, suffering without proper access to diabetes testing supplies and insulin. I’ve concluded that the moment Phil thought that James had found the courage to speak up in his own defense, Phil was instantly in contact in a most personal and threatening manner. To me, that speaks volumes for the character, ethics and morality of Phil Southerland.

Here are a few more details.

Immediately after Part 2 of my interview with James Stout went up, there was this comment posted to the Cyclismas site by an “AJohnson”:

How anybody could take this interview serious is beyond me. This kid has the reputation of a liar and a talentless cyclist. Plus, it sounds as if the interviewer is just trying to start a bunch of rumors about one of the few teams that is actually trying to do something good in cycling.”

First, the assessment that James is a “talentless cyclist” is something you may think is hinted at in our interview, where James tells us that he was at first on the elite team, and then on the developmental team. Except that if he were truly talentless, he would have simply been released. No team keeps on riders that cannot help the team, and no team should have to justify getting rid of a rider like that. That’s just a part of sports; if you aren’t good enough, you go home.

If James had been struggling in his performances, this is the kind of thing that would generally be known by someone who raced against James, but even more so by his coaches and teammates. But no such sentiments have been found online to back it up and no evidence nor even accusations of James presumed lack of talent were given as reasons for his release. To toss that out publicly now is disingenuous.

Second, in my researching James, I did not come across a single reference about any lack of truthfulness or integrity in him. Not one. Even afterward a Google search for “James Stout liar” brings nothing. Nothing.

Instead, what I’ve been sent since the interview started going up has been 100% in praise of James and his character, that he’s pleasant, trusted, that the information he’s shared about diabetes has allowed individuals to help themselves and to help others.

Aside from the mysterious and utterly unsupported “AJohnson” comment, not so much as a single comment, tweet or email has even hinted at James Stout lacking integrity or honesty. Not. Even. One.

The statements in the “AJohnson” comment are the types of statements that are made by disgruntled employers trying to cover their asses.

So I speculated that “AJohnson” was actually Phil Southerland himself, or else someone very close to Phil.

I discussed this with William Thacker, the publisher of Cyclismas, who checked the IP address. This is what he told me he found:

“The comment came from an ISP in Georgia, just outside Atlanta.”

The IP address has been saved, just so we can back that claim up.

Where is Team Type 1 headquartered? Atlanta, Georgia.

The day after “AJohnson” left his comment, Chris Baldwin started asking people I know about how to reach Cyclismas. He was given the editor’s email address, but has yet to contact her.

Chris Baldwin, according to the team’s website, is TT1’s PR Director for Europe. Right, he’s not a manager, he’s a PR guy, a spin doctor. That says to me that the team wants to spin the James Stout “problem” and that they feel that the interview contains things that embarrass them.

Then I have to think, “This Southerland guy seems far too much like Lance Armstrong, in all the most negative ways.”

• As with Lance, everyone who speaks out against him is a liar, bitter and jealous because they have no talent.
• As with Lance, sure he’s done a few questionable things, but you should just ignore all that because he’s really an unappreciated Man of the People, doing such good that any evil is negligible.

Phil seems to be setting himself up as a messiah figure, the savior of all those with type 1 diabetes. Much like Lance Armstrong has set himself up as the messiah figure to all those with cancer. Much like, in 1978, Jim Jones had set himself up as messiah to his followers in The People’s Temple, leading them to the tragedy in Guyana, and giving us the original reference of “drink the koolaid.”

I ask you now, can it be concluded that much like Lance Armstrong, Phil Southerland is a bully, a sociopath and a coward?

It is my fond hope that other abused riders will take courage from James Stout, and come forward to tell their stories, too.

This is my throne. This is my sport.

Now before all of you get excited and start pulling up your chairs hoping for me to start discussing the parcours, who will beat Contador, or who will win the key stages – this is not what I mean whatsoever. No, I’m describing the media circus that I create with the attention of 900 million viewers upon the sport.

Didi and the Tour two of my Top Ten Things.

Yes, we usually begin with soft rollouts – allow certain teams to “leak” information of which riders are supposedly moving to which team, then move to the creation of some sort of antagonistic relationship with someone. Last year it was the AFLD. This year we’ve decided to give the bureaucrats a break and turn our focus to the media. And who better than to pick on but those rotten good-for-nothing Germans who have the Pelotas to have a so-called “Anti-doping team” for a TV channel? Seriously.
I may be guilty of putting enough hot lead into the media carcass to the point that the carcass is nothing but a 3000 tonne pile of bullets. I’m tired of these fooking media shites running to and fro, alternating between fooking whining about “the dopers, the dopers” and “the evil bureaucracy.” Since when have you leeches become judge, jury and executioner? When did we actually start giving a shite about your simple-minded opinions? You are supposed to be paid automatons that cover the sport. Impartial. Whether it’s good or bad, it makes no difference.
Frankly, based on many of your performances where you think that you are as important as the athlete you are interviewing, by even making references to your bike skills “off the bike,” by vaulting through airports, crowing about how your “interval” training gave you an “edge” in making a flight, means that maybe an inanimate object in your possession may just be a better journalist than you.
Now then, let’s get to some real work here. I mean, I wouldn’t be doing the proper job from the throne if I didn’t give you some well-seasoned words of advice. Would you like a few tips on shite-detecting from me? When you’re interviewing people and you want to know if they are LYING, try following along with me with these simple steps:

The Detecting Who Is a Fooking Liar’s Guidebook:

A. Physical expression will be limited and stiff, with few arm and hand movements. Hand, arm and leg movement are toward their own body as the liar takes up less space.

B. A person who is lying to you will avoid making eye contact.

It's a non-eye contact stand off.

C. Hands touching their face, throat & mouth. Touching or scratching the nose or behind their ear. Not likely to touch his chest/heart with an open hand.

Goes without saying

D. Expressions are limited to mouth movements when someone is faking emotions (like happy, surprised, sad, awestruck) instead of the whole face. For example; when someone smiles naturally their whole face is involved: jaw/cheek movement, eyes and forehead push down, etc.

Textbook

E. A guilty person gets defensive. An innocent person will often go on the offensive.

The Deny Defense

F. A liar is uncomfortable facing his questioner/accuser and may turn his head or body away.

King of Pain

G. A liar might unconsciously place objects (book, coffee cup, etc.) between themselves and you.

This is not at all awkward, eh Mr. Wilcockson?

Alright, does this help a little, journalism wannabees? If you see any of these signs, you may want to ask additional PROBING questions.
Since the above isn’t occurring, I take exception when all this turns either into a happy wankfest like we suffered through with Lance, to the German’s extreme of finding every single shred of partial needles sticking in a broadloom carpet from 1976. Where the hell is the balance? Why do I have to keep telling you lemmings how to do your bloody jobs? Most importantly what the fook is wrong with all you publishers/editors who seem more interested in hiring PR/Marketing grads rather than true journalists? I mean, Stokes, Benson and Farrand are starting to feel pretty lonely these days.

Still upset that McEwen is absent....

Speaking of lonely, it seems that that interesting and eccentric James Stout has received some notoriety these days, especially after his expose on the fickle nature of the peloton. Only in the puritanical United States would some team paper pusher attempt to kill a contract over a penis t-shirt. Of course, the word “penis” is a pretty sensitive subject due to that Representative from the state of New York. As I told James, I think “Dick” would have slipped under the radar.
Suffice to say, I believe we have a little more work to do to ensure that the riders have a wee bit more protection – while many may say there are two sides to every story and will attempt to work both sides of the aisle, where there’s smoke, there’s usually fire. Stout’s assertions, however clouded by a potentially questionable format, have strong validity, and should be pursued to their conclusion. I recommend reading this link http://www.newcyclingpathway.com/news/blog/the-global-mission-of-team-type-1-and-the-ethics-of-managing-a-team in order to truly see the “Full Monty” of the situation.
However, I digress.
Where was I? Oh yes. Doping and the Tour de France. My favourite time of year. It’s like Christmas in a cup. Or a Guinness. Or a big Chewbacca fur coat being worn by Floyd Landis in an Outside Magazine interview. I’m quite envious of Floyd’s impersonation of Vin Diesel in that furryesque planetoid in the accompanying photo. Well, at least @neilroad didn’t ruin the article. This is the subject that has all the media wringing their hands more than Sally Field on the stage acccepting an Oscar. No, not the fur coat you gits; the subject I’m discussing is the Tour de France and Doping.
We’ve again inked a deal with the AFLD to cover the field, as we’ve been accused of ignoring the highest-rated riders in our Index of Suspicion Hit List. Yes, we have 9′s and 10′s, and yes they never were tested, but it does take several letters, emails, and committees to make those decisions when I’m somewhere in China/South America devising more ways to line my pockets — er help raise the profile of cycling throughout the world.
We’ve got 500 or so shots to find someone guilty. Sure, we primarily focused on the biological passport programme testing, but only because I really doubt anyone would even think about dosing themselves with any EPO-related products these days after the debacles dating back to 2006. Nevermind that many investigations are still open and pending, like Jan Ullrich, but remember, we’re all about raising the profile of our hallowed sport any way we can. But enough about this dopage business; I’m sure all of you would prefer to read the analysis of how someone is going to use their defensive skills to somehow magically beat Contador to the Champs.

Sacrificial Lamb for Petacchi?

No, just because in the coming seven days we’re going to read more of the following as we get closer to Stage 1: major players falling afoul of the biological passport programme; some Tour Contender will make an inappropriate comment or two about their fellow rider; I might make a statement or two about certain teams having difficulty renewing their WorldTour Status; Italians will be whining about everything under the sun; WADA will be whining about our latest accusations; Floyd will make some sort of defamatory statement about something related to Lance, God love ‘em. I know I do.
So to wrap things up, if this sounds like another fooking broken record to those of you who read on a regular basis (that means you @broomwagonblog who hasn’t posted anything new since February while I’ve churned out 16 straight weeks of columns) then I have one suggestion for you: This is my finger, and that’s the door.