Peter Sagan, Daniel Oss and Elia Viviani bake in the sauna (Photo by Bettini, courtesy of cyclingnews.com)

However, Cyclismas has learned the real reason for the departure from Liquigas, and the simple explanation is due to Nibali’s exclusion from the ranks of the coveted Cycling Sauna Club.

According to anonymous sources that may or may not be American Liquigas team member Ted King, Nibali was excluded from the CSC – Liquigas branch by the current mini poobah, Peter Sagan.

“Look, you didn’t  hear this from me, but Nibbles is pissed off that he doesn’t get invited to the sauna parties by Oss, Viviani, and Sagan.  He thought he should be a member if not the leader. But the Grand Poobahs of the Cycling Sauna Club, Franco Pellizotti and Pippo Pozzato, said that Nibs was too tame and boring to be invited in, let alone be a key member,” according to a certain Sauna Club acolyte who wishes to keep his east coast afro anonymous.

According to other sources, Nibali was also miffed that Sagan received an invite to the Slovakian Miss Universe tryouts, and had the Liquigas team blessing to attend because of his status in the Cycling Sauna Club. Nibali apparently confronted Liquigas chief Robert Amadio about the fact that Sagan skipped Paris-Roubaix for Cycling Sauna Club duties. Amadio allegedly told Nibali that his hands were tied and he’d just have to learn his place.

When asked about the snub, Nibali refused to comment outside of stating that his Fizik adverts should have given him entrance to the club, and made some rather dramatic Sicilian gestures before hopping on his scooter.

Cyclismas caught up with Sagan, who was test driving his new Ferrari F12 Berlinetta in Monaco with his brother Juraj in anticipation of the Monaco Grand Prix at the end of the month. He was frank in his candid comments.

“Vincenzo is a nice man. But he is no fun. He has no Sauna vibe. It’s too sad. He didn’t learn from Franco at all. Vincenzo really just has no style and a tremendous amount of anger. It must be a Sicilian thing,” commented Sagan, “He attacks his women like he attacks in races – too early and without enough stamina to last to the end.”

Rumor has it Nibali’s agent is attempting to work a deal with Team Sky for Nibal to transfer to the British super team.

“Nibali would probably be a very good fit with the proper, uptight, and superior Brits. Lord knows he’s struggled to fit into a passionate Mediterranean line up. Maybe he needs the regimented and inflexible routine of Team Sky,” declared his lawyer, Alex Carrera.

As per UCI contract rules, there won’t be any declaration of team changes until after the Tour de France in July.

Peter Sagan, Daniel Oss and Elia Viviani in an example of "lewd" behavior according to the Omani Government (Photo by Bettini, courtesy of cyclingnews.com)

The government of Oman – known for its censorship of Internet sites that are deemed “pornographic” – also engages in the active monitoring of all cell phones, Web chat rooms, and social media platforms to prevent the exchange of anti-government information and “lewd behavior.” Noted member of the cycling team 1t4i, Simon Geschke, even took to Twitter to issue a veiled warning earlier in the week to those heading to Oman.

However, it didn’t prevent the detention of the Liquigas team, when star sprinter Peter Sagan allegedly sent another sauna photograph to Daniel Oss, in what seems to be a running team joke that started at training camp. Oss, in turn, allegedly sent them to fellow teammates. The photos in question were tagged “Full Moon,” “Trouser Snake,” and “Old Red Eye.”

“While this behavior may be acceptable in other regions, we expect that the cycling people respect our laws and customs while riding on our soil. We have paid extravagant dollars to the UCI in order to project a friendly tourist environment, and this pornographic behavior is a spit in the face,” commented Yusuf bin Alawi bin Abdullah, the Oman foreign affairs minister.

Robert Amadio, Liquigas team manager, commented to the press from Italy, “We are working through diplomatic channels as we speak. This is all a big misunderstanding. We gather that should the right people be spoken to, we will have the team ready for the first stage tomorrow without any additional trouble.”

UCI president Pat McQuaid was blunt on the subject.

“Look, these boys need to understand that they have to conduct themselves in an appropriate manner. This isn’t some sort of American university frat party. This isn’t American Pies. This is cycling. And if they want to race, they have to abide by the rules of all the oppressive regimes where we set up our races,” stated McQuaid.

Fellow members of the peloton were quick to defend the Liquigas team. However, rumors of a “set up” by Tyler Farrar to “tilt sprint victories in his favor” by having Sagan, Oss, and the Liquigas team detained were hinted by unnamed RadioShack-Nissan team members.

Stage one of the Tour of Oman starts from the Royal Palace on Tuesday, and should have team Liquigas at the start.