Cyclismas.com has learned that the UCI sent “cease and desist” letters to the RFEC, stating that the actions were unsanctioned and in violation of the UCI’s cyclist’s code of conduct. The UCI asked the RFEC for immediate retraction of any published videos portraying the hand motions  in any of the racing or podium ceremonies, including Twitter, Facebook, YouTube or “any other social media outlet of evil.”

KoM winner Simon Clarke and Eurosport reporter Laura Meseguer demonstrate the motions deemed “illegal” by the UCI. (Photo courtesy of Laura Meseguer)

“We feel the Call Me Maybe work by the Orica-GreenEDGE team promotes the spirit of teamwork and camaraderie, and shows that the sport of cycling isn’t just about winning at all costs, but also about the joy competition brings. We fail to see the difference between raising arms in victory on the podium or pointing at numbers on the jersey,” stated the joint press release.However, the RFEC and Unipublic, the organiser of the Vuelta, didn’t see where the actions were a violation of any codes – UCI or otherwise – issuing this joint statement via the aforementioned “evil” social media feeds:

The press release further noted that neither the team nor any individuals from the team had experienced any personal profit or sponsorship gain from the arrangement, nor had they made use of the Vuelta trademarks in the filming or playback of the footage.

UCI spokesperson Enrico Carpani stated that the UCI felt differently.

“We have asked for the video files from the RFEC in order for us to conduct our own review to determine if the footage is in violation of UCI rules,” stated Carpani.

Cycling pundits around the globe were rather confused by the request.

“For goodness sake, it’s on YouTube. Does anyone at the UCI know how to use a computer? Seriously, people, I mean, this organization is just becoming a laughing stock of itself,” stated one anonymous pundit who may or may not have been Cycling Weekly journalist Sophie Smith.

UCI president Pat McQuaid was on his pre-Trinidad annual holiday in the Caymans and unavailable for comment. All three UCI vice-presidents were unable to be found for comment, which has been the case since 2005. The UCI also refused to confirm, in fact, if said vice presidents – Hee Wok Cho, Renato di Rocco, and Artur Lopes – had even been consulted at all on the scandal internally referred to as “MaybeGate.”

Orica-GreenEDGE spokesperson Brian Nygaard had this to say about the controversy:

“I’m proud of the work our team did. RFEC has no issue with our work. Unipublic wishes to use our product in future race promotion. And the UCI? It’s business as usual from that particular organisation,” stated Nygaard.

No word yet if the UCI will take this case to the Court of Arbitration for Sport. CAS representatives were unable to confirm if they had received any contact from the UCI.

Andy and Frank ignore Johan, looking for Kim

According to anonymous sources, Becca was heard discussing the “complete and total ineptitude of the chunky chin-dimpled charlatan” who promised him a top team finish in the World Tour capped off with a Tour de France victory.

The fashionable Karimova was seen giving pointers to Becca on how to deal with “servants who won’t listen,” advice which, according to those same anonymous sources, gave Becca an ear-to-ear grin. The Uzbekistani first daughter was in Luxembourg pitching her line of clothing, her new album, and also celebrating her recent request to be the official Uzbekistan representative to the United Kingdom. It has been rumored that Becca is collaborating with Itera’s Igor Makarov on several construction projects in the emerging oil nation, and the appearance at the event would confirm there are discussions in the works.

When asked directly about the Bruyneel situation, Becca was forthcoming on details.

“I’m tired of the excuses from the Johan. He has been blaming Kim Andersen for all the troubles to start the season, so I have removed Kim from the Tour de France and told Johan he has to sit in the car and personally oversee the Andy victory I’ve been promised,” commented Becca.

Becca also offered answers to questions on the lacklustre start to the RadioShack-Nissan season, where the team has enjoyed only two victories, whereas at the same time last year under former team manager Brian Nygaard, they had nine to their credit.

“As long as there is victory at the Tour, I will be somewhat serene with the fact there is less wins this year,” adding, “…but that doesn’t stop me from calling Johan at least 15 times a day wanting explanations on why we’ve lost at almost every single race. I have mellowed slightly this year, though. Last year I called Brian at least 17 times a day, and also demanded a report of where he was at the time, what he ate, and a daily update on team expenditures in detail via written report and oral conference call.”

When asked if a loss at the Tour would spell the end of the relationship with Bruyneel, Becca confirmed there were negotiations with other cycling experts.

“Considering Riis‘ situation with SaxoBank at the moment, I have reached out to Bjarne to see if he’d like to join our fold. The poor man is in a similar situation to Johan’s last year. Hopefully I’ll be able to negotiate a better deal with Bjarne as he is someone who has a proven track record to create winners from multiple athletes, rather than just one,” concluded Becca.

Becca is heading to Liège-Bastogne-Liège to directly oversee the team, and to negotiate with UCI president Pat McQuaid on relaxing the WorldTour rules in order to allow Bruyneel the ability to ride in the team cars at the Tour de France, in spite of the fact Bruyneel is not listed anywhere on the team paperwork and current rules thus prohibit his direct participation.