Farrar blasts Garmin-Barracuda signings and team tactics

Team Garmin-Barracuda sprinter Tyler Farrar let a barrage fly at the conclusion of stage four of the Tour of Qatar, where he flatted near the finish and lost out in another battle with the who’s who of the sprint world. Farrar let out an audible “F-Bomb” while riding by the camera crew at the finish of the stage, and continued on a tirade directed at anyone within a 5 km radius.

Farrar is visibly disturbed after getting "smoked" on consecutive stages (photo courtesy of KARIM JAAFAR/AFP/Getty Images)

 

“This team is a joke. Greipel’s team signs the best of the former HTC leadout train, including [Adam] Hansen and Hendy [Greg Henderson]. Eisel, who beat me to the line today is picked up for Cav, Boonen’s going like he’s back on coke again, and all these young guns are coming at me like a fucking tennis ball machine gone mad,” commented a livid Farrar.

When asked to clarify what signings were a joke, Farrar replied, “Bauer. Haas. Klier. I mean it’s a buffet of opportunists for the classics, not a group of guys who can deliver me to a finish line. Fischer is the best I’ve got? Seriously? C’mon, this team is a joke. Vaughters promises all sorts of shit, and then all he cares about is time trial crap because he thinks it’s all Salinger ‘pure’ and shit. Man, I gotta go to a new team that knows what they’re doing. I shouldn’t have flatted,” continued Farrar.

When asked if team tactics played a part in how the stage finished, Farrar was blunt, “You’ll have to ask Weltz that, if he can get his head out of Armstrong’s ass long enough,” in reference to Directeur Sportif Johnny Weltz’ pro-Armstrong rant after the long-running federal investigation was closed by U.S. Attorney André Birotte on Friday.

Garmin-Barracuda CEO Johnathan Vaughters was less impressed with the comments, considering it was the second time in less than a week that an employee broke ranks and spoke publicly on subjects which cast the team in an unfavorable light.

“There must be something in the water in Qatar. Either that, or my mind control chips must not work in that region. We’ll have to get both Farrar and Weltz back to the lab for some electronic fine tuning,” commented Vaughters, adding, “First Weltz. Then Contador breaks in on our victory dance, and now Farrar is going rogue. I think I need to throw some sort of AIGCP smackdown to take away the spotlight from our team issues.”

Stage Five of the Tour of Qatar goes on Thursday, where it is expected that Mark Cavendish will again take his turn at frustrating Farrar.

 

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Frank Mercer has been covering the pro cycling scene since 1985 when he accidentally wandered onto the Champs-Élysées during the final stage where Davis Phinney rammed into him, creating massive controversy. He's been in love with the sport ever since. Mercer has been writing his "News or Not" stories for over two years, and has successfully punked Russian, Belgian, French, British, and American press services into thinking his stories are real. Mercer is also responsible for creating the scripts for the CCNN-TV broadcasts. You can follow him on Twitter @CyclismasMercer