Cyclismas has learned that the Irish Government has written a stinging rebuke to UCI President Pat McQuaid for “perpetuating the myth that Irish people are a bit thick.”
The Irish Prime Minister, Enda Kenny, says that he had no choice but to issue the sanction given the numerous gaffes, slip-ups and general stupidity of Pat McQuaid.
Speaking exclusively to Cyclismas, Kenny said;
The Irish Government has had to resort to a law in the Statute Book that states any Irishman who perpetually brings the Irish nation into disrepute can be penalised, firstly in writing – the measure we have now taken – and secondly by pinning a sign on the offender for no less than 30 days that says; I’m the stupider fecker. Please kick me!”
The Taoiseach added:
No one wants to see things proceed to that degree. We haven’t had to resort to those measures since that gobshite Chris de Burgh started yammering on about that fecking Lady In Red!”
According to Irish Law, McQuaid has seven days to publicly apologize to Ireland for his misdemeanors.